Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Handfasting

I have had a few requests for how to perform a handfasting ceremony. Below is the exact wording and actions that happened. If you have any questions, please post a comment!




Declaration of Intent. A Scottish Hand Fasting Ceremony

Officiant: Know now before you go further, that since your lives have crossed in this life, you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter this state of matrimony, you should strive to make this real, the ideas that give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?

Groom and Bride: We do.

Officiant: Groom and Bride, I bid you look into each other’s eyes.

Groom, will you cause Bride pain?

Groom: Yes

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Groom: No.

Officiant: Bride, will you cause Groom pain?

Bride: Yes.

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Bride: No.

Officiant: Will you share each other’s pain, and seek to ease it?

Bride + Groom:: Yes

Officiant: And so the binding is made. Join your hands.

(Place first cord across couple’s hands)

Officiant: Bride, will you share Groom’s laughter?

Bride: Yes

Officiant: Groom, will you share Bride’s laughter?

Groom:Yes

Officiant: Will you look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?

Groom and Bride: Yes

Officiant: And the binding is made.

(Place second cord across the couple’s hands)

Officiant: Groom, will you burden Bride?

Groom: Yes

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Groom: No

Officiant: Bride, will you burden Groom?

Bride: Yes.

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Bride: No.

Officiant: Will you share the burdens of each so that your spirits may grow in this union?

Groom and Bride: Yes

Officiant: And so the binding is made.

(Drape the third cord across the couple’s hands)

Officiant: Bride, will you share Groom’s dreams?

Bride: Yes,

Officiant: Groom, will you share Bride’s dreams?

Groom: Yes.

Officiant: Will you dream together to create new realities and hopes?

Groom and Bride: Yes

Officiant: And so the binding is made.

(Drape the fourth cord across couple’s hands.)

Officiant: Groom, will you cause Pam anger?

Groom: Yes

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Groom: No.

Officiant: Bride, will you cause Groom anger?

Bride: Yes.

Officiant: Is that your intent?

Bride: No.

Officiant: Will you take the heat of anger and use it to temper the strength of this union?

Groom and Bride: Yes.

Officiant: And so the binding is made.

(Drape the fifth cord across the couple’s hands.)

Officiant: Bride, will you honor Groom?

Bride: Yes.

Officiant: Groom, will you honor Bride?

Groom: Yes.

Officiant: Will you make every effort to keep that honor intact?

Groom and Bride: Yes

Officiant: And so the binding is made.

(Drape sixth cord across couple’s hands)

(Pick up the cords, tie them in a knot.)

Officiant: This binding ceremony reminds us how your lives are held together, not by these cords, but by your vows. For these cords may be dropped without real harm, but the making or breaking of your union depends on how you maintain the vows you have made with each other today. May you be blessed to do so.

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